The other story...

I shared the first story first…the one where Alexys learned to breastfeed. You can look up billions of stories about successful breastfeeding relationships. There are millions (okay, I made that number up – but I’m sure it’s not that much of a stretch) of websites dedicated to breastfeeding and learning how to be successful at it.

But what about the other half of the story? You know. Weaning. Yep, I said it. Why is this term so taboo? When you google “how to wean,” yes, lot’s of phrases come up. But if you actually click through them they all offer the same one piece of advice: drop one feeding at a time. Okay, great. That sounds easy when you read it. In reality, it’s kinda difficult and I found myself very frustrated with this advice. Upon delving deeper into weaning websites, I discovered 95% of websites share only sad weaning stories. About how terrible it was to wean – it hurt, it was against my will for medical reasons, I lost my baby…all terrible, unfortunate circumstances, true…but why is weaning associated with such negativity? I suppose it’s to discourage people from weaning “too soon” and to make breastfeeding sound more optimal (which I don’t think is being done by posting terrible weaning stories, but that’s another story altogether). Anyways, I found myself stuck with two ideals: baby-led weaning or mother-led weaning. Nothing in the middle. If I choose to wean, I am leading it. If Alexys magically stops, then she is weaning. I don’t like the way mother-led weaning sounds, but I suppose that’s what we’ve done.

I’d like to say that I always planned on breastfeeding Alexys to 1 year. I support 100% those who choose to go past that point, but my lifestyle and my choices are not in line with that choice. I always knew that come one year, Alexys would be weaned. I always knew it would be a process. I don’t like the idea of going cold turkey (especially watching a friend suffer from mastitis, yuck). And so the process began months ago. I suppose, technically, I did just drop one feeding a day, and replace it with milk or formula and a sippy or a bottle, depending. It was especially hard to drop the night feedings and a little bit of tears were shed during that time. In the end, I replaced night feedings with bottles of water…which Alexys has almost weaned herself off of, already. Anyways.

We still breastfeed once a day at this point. Yes, I’m a little sad that our breastfeeding days are coming to their end. Yes, I know they don’t have to, but it’s my belief that we actually did have a mix of baby-led and mama-led weaning. In fact, Alexys never once asked for milk today. I could have easily stopped breastfeeding today. We’ve chosen not to for a few more weeks. She happily nursed this afternoon. I didn’t have to fight her to get off me though and make her stop feeding. It wasn’t a sad moment for her. She’s okay with being a big girl…probably even more so than the mama is ready for her to be a big girl.

I’m not sure there’s a point to this post, except to say that weaning is not always a sad thing. It’s a proud thing for both of us – we made it this far and Alexys is growing up. It’s a 2-in-1 moment. It’s a successful moment. I couldn’t be prouder that I stuck it out with breastfeeding, but at the same time I couldn’t be prouder that my little girl is growing up.

kortney elise xoxo